yes.

let us not forget

i would go to bed soon so i can wake up early in the morning, but this seems worth staying up a little bit to say...

georgia tech fans, let's not be so short-minded.
let's not hate scott blair. let's give him a break.

i mean, really, i understand that he missed the one point that the world had its attention on. one extra point kick. but on the counter, what led to him having to kick that? isn't that just as important?

stats: georgia tech had 4 turnovers that game: 3 fumbles and threw one interception. i believe uga had managed to convert 21 points off our turnovers. so then the question comes, offense, what up with that? if we played better, didn't have so many turnovers, if our defense could stop georgia's offense (which looked really good today, let's face it) maybe we would have been ahead. if our offense wouldn't get beat by georgia's defense, we could have scored ahead. if nesbitt didn't tackle that hokies player, maybe we could have scored more. maybe, maybe maybe.

what happened to, "be a team player -- it diffuses the blame"? what happened to support?
and you know, honestly, rivalry can only provide so much trash talk. is it really necessary to stoop so low as to call one school a "cesspool of the south?" tech, we're not that great either.

"we're a 70-30 ratio of boys to girls, but since half of our guys don't leave their dorms anyway, we're closer to being 50-50."

and so on.

i may be defending uga because i want to go there next year, but regardless. after four years and a bit, it gets a little tiring.

6 miles!

and three big black guys complimented me about it!

i mean, really, how often do you get complimented by black guys on fitness?

this has become a really awesome saturday.

checks and balances for the turkey

so one of the things i decided to do this week was to run a grand total of 30 miles on the treadmill between monday and sunday. theoretically, this shouldn't be TOO bad -- it's only running 4 and a bit miles every day. however, procrastination is the devil, and so while i did get to a great start on monday, tuesday and wednesday i certainly did not run and really didn't have much of an excuse for it. so wednesday night came about (where i probably should have run a couple miles to make a ding on the numbers i had to run, which had turned to 5 and a bit), and it wasn't looking any better. i started pushing yesterday, and today, i ran a total of 7.15 miles (5 miles in the morning, 2 in the evening). i've now got 14.92 miles left between saturday, sunday to complete this.

this was all inspired after an ultimate tournament and i felt like the least fit person on the field. part of me thinks this might be detrimental before the tournament next saturday, but you know, i need to stop making excuses, so here i am. whether i complete my goal by sunday, i've learned that (at least on a treadmill), 3 miles is not my limit. it's been a good time to fulfill my other goal for this week which was to stop making excuses about my lack of learning about God each day. i didn't realize how refreshing it is to listen to a sermon while running. it definitely takes the passiveness portion out of it. guess i can't do that on sundays though. hm.

this semester has been rough. gotta keep going though. almost there.

maybe even one day, a tambourine

"You can't just buy me a guitar every time you screw up, you know?"

"Yeah, I know...

...

...But then, you know, there's always drums, and bass, and maybe even one day a tambourine. "

being told that you are preferred to work with over the smartest person ever is quite a compliment.

"peaches," new heights

You say good morning, and good evening
The day is done, and you've come to find
The words are fleeting, I hear your quiet breathing
Is something wrong?

You come on two knees, with more than two needs
Finding that it's all too easy
To be helped and found
You slept and he said

It is in you, to carry on
It is in you, to lay down fears that hold
It is in you, to find your way home

Daylight's coming, the sun is blazing
New beginnings seep into you
But in the end it's distant shadows
That finally overwhelm your senses
And this time around
Is it love that you crown?
And this time around
You'll be more than who you are

Could you find yourself a way home?

on bicycles

shune: "i don't know... sometimes i like my bike color, and other times, not so much."
susie: "why?"
shune: "oh, because it's not a manly color you know, it's kind of [hand gesture]."
susie: "it's okay shune, you have a girlfriend."

...

i feel like this can be applied to a lot of various situations i am in.
love, i'm sorry i'm so weird :\

at this point, it's purely damage control

presentation today.
probably the least prepared i've ever been for one. a lot of things have gone wrong, and to be honest, i don't think this was in any way avoidable. so gotta dig deep, get through it, and move on in my life.

gre biology tomorrow. will be end of a really long, hard fought battle.

and the start of everything being out of my control.

hum. that sounds familiar.

let me get through this.

GRE general: done.

all in all, disaster turned into an ok situation?

next week sat: GRE bio. and lots and lots of due dates. prepare for turbulence.

fear for future

i'm currently petrified right now -- between this week and next i have to take my GREs general and subject test in bio. if there was any moment where i've tried my hardest to peer into the future, this would be it. i'm thinking of alternative options, escape plans, but i know that whatever happens will happen.

"we can make our plans, but the Lord determines our path."
~Proverbs 16:9

"life is like a box of chocolates -- you never know what you're gonna get."

UGA.
have at it at Kansas.

i turned to these pages, and i felt a lot better.

"...for the lord God is a sun and shield
the Lord bestows favor and honor.
No good thing does He withhold
from those who walk uprightly.
O Lord of hosts,
blessed is the one who trusts in you."
~Psalm 84:11-12

"...will you not revive us again
that your people may rejoice in you?
show us your steadfast love, O Lord
and grant us your salvation.
let me hear what God the Lord will speak
for he will speak peace to His people, to His saints;
but let them not turn back to folly,
surely his salvation is near to those who fear him,
that glory may dwell in our land.
steadfast love and faithfulness meet;
righteousness and peace kiss each other.
faithfulness springs up from the ground
yes, the Lord will give what is Good
and our land yield its increase.
Righteousness will go before him
and make his footsteps away."
~Psalm 85:6-13

[insert expletive here]

my goal for the next couple weeks included studying GRE, completing my personal statement, and reading.

due to the fact my bag is doing more traveling than i am

(my bag flight path: atlanta --> los angeles --> new york --> fiji --> korea --> ???????
my flight path: atlanta --> los angeles --> tokyo --> fukuoka)

i cannot study for GRE (since that is where my books are).
...well, not as effectively study, mayhaps.

i have therefore concentrated my efforts on completing my personal statement. which has taken a lot of thinking.

maybe i should just copy-paste my blog. that would work... right?

this week:

(monday) friend from zambia who i hadn't seen in six years dropped by for three hours for dinner. forgot keys and book at taco mac. drove back. rushed to finish lab report.
(tuesday) last lab of the semester before practicum. sigh. ultimate frisbee WOOOOOOOOO.
(wednesday) 5 am shift. sprints. take home test start. sigh. family group WOOOOOOOOOO.
(thursday) 5 am shift. get stuff done. catch up. bible study! ultimate frisbee WOOOOOOOOO.
(friday) 5 am shift. fly to milwaukee. WOOOOOOOOOO.
(saturday) [one of my] best friend's wedding. sigh. and :D
(sunday) panic. because practicum t minus two days.

this semester needs to be over. this summer has been bizarre.

"young adult"

this particular phrase, whether it's a jca thing or it's a commonly used term, has been standing out to me particularly. when i first heard the term i was a little shocked, thinking "well, aren't college students technically 'young adults?'" however, recently i guess i've observed how juvenile college students (myself included) really are. part of it, i think, is due to perception. i think part of it can be explained to the shifts in the generation, where more and more kids have the opportunity to go to college.

at lifeguarding today, one of the staff was getting irritated with people being late. so an e-mail was sent, which i thought was fairly reasonable, and part of me was not surprised that the uproar it caused. i was talking to my friend, and he was getting defensive that he was late because he has to drive from an hour out of town. much as i do feel his pain, i had to argue that it wasn't right, and late is late. a lot of the lifeguards turn the other cheek when it comes to slight tardiness, but i think people often forget that it's the supervisor's grace, and not obligation, about why this happens.

i understand this is a minute deal, but it's these small things that eventually add up. and i get taught that there's a whole lot more patience that i need. and all in all, i think it showed that we all have a lot of growing up to do. and in general, no matter how old we are, we're still children. for good or for bad.

when i was supposed to be
asleep, i found myself glancing
at pictures of not-me,
at their pre-grad lives, dancing
through the times, as if eternity
was a true thing.

and it made me wonder
at all the unfinished works
hindered, forgotten, cast under --
bottled by a stubborn cork
dreams torn asunder
and forgotten.

yet despite the plans that failed
truly, what appeared in its stead,
a quiet, long and winding trail
a story uncertain, unknown, unread
emboldened, and gave a soul unfrail
and ready to not forget.

one thing i love about summer league ultimate is the number of people that bring dogs. and they are always so awesome! at least one of them catches discs. and they're always so HAPPY.

sigh. :D

ultimate

need to:

1. calm down, don't panic. complete the pass.
2. really cut, no banana cuts.
3. cut back into the straight stack.
4. run. run run run.

pretty much a worthless post, but...

a lot of good things have been happening lately.

however, i will leave with simply this:

my heart is is disturbed and excited at the potential that our summer ultimate team might be called:

BIEBER FEVER.

i sound like a broken record as i say this

but i really do miss ultimate. and every time i'm out there it feels so good.
today was the first ultimate get together i've had in awhile. it was nice but at the same time... i was so unfit.

i hope after a month of this i can keep up. running has got so many motivators now...

and you know, now that i've gone from THREE classes to TWO classes (as LCC wouldn't let me register), i really have no reason... and now to look for a volunteering gig for the summer...

i do have a bike too. with working (pending) brakes? so yeah. really, time to be somewhat active (and safe). no wipeouts this semester.

gravy.

started working on my personal statement for pre-vet. good grief, i hope i can pull this off. i'm going to have to be really convincing (and not too cliché) to be able to make it... and pray. i hope this is the right direction.

pride

the older i get, i feel like the harder it gets to fight with this.
that being said, the older i get, the more pride beatdowns i get too.

sigh.

running has all of a sudden become difficult. i need to get back in shape. half marathon in the fall? i hope i can keep this up.

also, mr rodriguez is now fulltime!
praise God :)

as the semester draws to a close

reflections coming soon.

BUT.

goals for the summer:

1. keep losing some poundage yo!
   
2. repeat insanity/ do p90x
3. run at least 5 miles by the end of summer with reasonable time
   
4. ultimate! ultimate ultimate ultimate -- really looking forward to summer league. NOT going to get injured (as often) this season.
   
5. go see adam, philsky, matt.
6. find some kind of volunteering gig with animals.
7. education!
   

a lot of things have been happening in my life.

classes have been rough as anything. i still carry on. lol. for the most part i still enjoy the majority of my classes, but honestly, another week break in between would have been nice.

love in all its forms is a wonderful thing.
it was ben's surprise b-day, and i'm still astounded at how ben's mom managed to organize us together.

things i want to maintain over the summer:

1. ultimate
2. reading
3. exercise (running, insanity again?, swim)

things i want to start over the summer:
1. riding my bike (again)
2. intern at the humane society
3. study for gre (well, you know, want vs need t0)

and if i can:
1. play tennis

i also plan on going to one of my best friends' wedding, up in wisconsin. i'm looking forward to seeing him again, and it's so strange how time jumps you. every time.

think of it like a big polar bear that's sitting next to you. you freak out at first, but then you get used to it. and then it takes a chunk of you. freaks you out. and then you settle down again.

bad analogy. hum.

as school progresses, clenching its green fingers around us in a fist, i've realized while i haven't felt too worried or stressed, i was certainly feeling the effects of self-centeredness. it made me a little ashamed and sad.

but, this week, somehow has been a time for rediscovering friends. little glimpses of quality time well spent with people i love.

i really need to catch up with people pronto.

i suggest some asian, or taco mac, or something else good.

btw, one of my best friends from zambia is getting lunch with me on sunday. does anybody want to join me? and have a good place to suggest (and if it's a little off campus, a car that can be provided?).

while the next couple weeks will be busy, i trust good things will happen.

hakuna matata

i was talking to the stingerette lady, the really cool one (amy) about yes man...

now that i've really enjoyed running in the mornings, i would love to have a camera. and run around a little after sun-up, and take random pictures.

i think though, it may have to wait until i've learned how to run 6+ miles.
i'm pretty sure i could run a pi now if i wanted to, alone.

i yell at the crashing waves of trial, as we did in destin

blessed is the man that endureth temptation: for when he is tried, he shall receive...

this semester (in its four weeks) have been the trial of my life.

the question in any interview, "describe when you had to work in a team setting that was not favorable" is now booked. along with "describe when you had a serious conflict." also, "describe any tough situations you've had."

my response to all would be, "thank god for great friends."

i am useless without them. all of them.

hakuna matata is a phrase that needs to return.
now that i've learned to organize my time (decently)... i think it's time to be no worries. i shouldn't let 3110 faze me. and after all that, i enjoy all my other classes. and you know what? i like my groupmates for 3110 for the most part.

i ask "why me?" when there are other people that could be suffering instead of me.

my mindset should be "thank god."
because i'm blessed with this opportunity once again.

everything will all work out.

hakuna matata

a little obscene

note:

NEVER, EVER go out jogging before taking your morning dump. no matter what. it can potentially take you to uncomfortable places, and all in all, who wants to have that seed of doubt (or poop) within while you're running?

so yeah. morning poop.

it's a way of life.

just do it.